The Letters From No One

• The escape of the boa constrictor earns Harry his longest ever punishment.
  • By the time he was let out of his cupboard, the summer holidays had started
    • Dudley's birthday is June 23rd, when did the summer holidays start??
      • Dudley has already broken several of his birthday gifts
      • First time out on his racing bike, Dudley knocks down Mrs Figg as she crosses Privet Drive on her crutches.
• Wish school over, Dudley's Gang visits the house every day.
  • all quite happy to join in Dudley's favorite sport: Harry Hunting.
• Harry expects to be finally going to a different school than Dudley
  • Dudley accepted to Vernon's old school: Smeltings
  • Harry expects to go to Stonewall High
    • Dudley says Stonewall stuff people's heads down the toilet the first day, offers to help Harry practice
      • Harry declines, says "The poor toilet's never had anything as horrible as your head down it--it might be sick."
• On a day in July, Petunia takes Dudley to London to buy his Smeltings uniform
  • Harry left at Mrs Figg's
    • Mrs Fig not as bad as usual
    • She broke her leg tripping over a cat, and wasn't as fond of them anymore. (perhaps the cat that represents Peter?)
    • Harry gets to watch TV and is given old chocolate cake
  • That evening, Dudley paraded around the living room in his new uniform
    • boys wear maroon tailcoats, orange knickerbockers, flat straw hats called boaters
    • they also carry knobbly sticks, used for hitting each other when teachers aren't looking
      • Good training for later life
    • Vernon's proudest day, Petunia cries about how handsome "Ickle Dudleykins" looks
    • Harry might have cracked a few rips trying not to laugh
• The next morning, a horrible smell is in the kitchen
  • large metal tub in the sink, with dirty rags in gray water
  • Petunia is dying old clothes of Dudley's gray to match Stonewall High's uniform
  • Harry says he didn't know it had to be so wet
    • Petunia tells Harry to not be stupid
  • Harry thinks he will look like he's wearing bits of old elephant skin (thought, not said)
• Dudley bangs his Smelting Stick on the table
• They hear the click of the mail slot and flop of letters on the door mat (regular postal mail, no mention of owl)
  • Vernon tells Dudley to get the mail
    • Dudley says, "Make Harry get it."
    • Vernon tells Harry to get the mail.
    • Harry tries to retort, "Make Dudley get it."
    • Vernon tells Dudley to poke Harry with the Smelting Stick
    • Harry dodges and goes to get the mail
  • Three things in the mail
    • Postcard from Marge
      • vacationing on Isle of Wight
      • ate a funny whelk, ill
    • brown envelope that looked like a bill
    • and--a letter for Harry
      • Mr. H. Potter, The Cupboard under the Stairs, 4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey
      • envelope is thick and heavy
      • yellowish parchment
      • address written in emerald green ink
      • No stamp
      • purple wax seal on back, bearing a coat of arms:
        • Lion, eagle, badger, snake, surrounding a large H
    • Vernon calls Harry to hurry up, asks if he's checking for letter bombs
  • Dudley first notices Harry has a letter
    • Vernon sharply jerks the letter out of Harry's hand
      • Vernon questions who'd be writing to Harry
      • when he realizes who, his face goes from red to green faster than a set of traffic lights. and didn't stop there. Goes grayish white as old porridge
    • Petunia looks as though she might faint
    • Dudley hits Vernon over the head with his stick,
    • Vernon sends both boys out
      • thrown out by the scruffs on their necks
      • Boys fight over the keyhole
        • Dudley wins
        • Harry listens at the floor under the door
    • Petunia and Vernon panic over the letter having Harry's cupboard address
      • they discuss what to do
        • Vernon suggests ignoring it
        • "I'm not having one in the house, Petunia! Didn't we swear when we took him in that we'd stamp out that dangerous nonsense?"
• That evening, Vernon visits Harry in his cupboard, something he'd never done before.
  • Harry demands his letter
  • Vernon says it was written to Harry by mistake
    • has burned it
  • Harry says it was not a mistake, "it had my cupboard on it."
    • Vernon decides it would be nice if Harry moved into Dudley's second bedroom
      • takes Harry one trip to move everything he owned
      • Dudley complains
        • whacks Vernon with Smelting Stick
        • is sick on purpose
        • kicks Petunia
        • throws his tortoise through greenhouse roof
    • Harry regrets not opening his letter in the hall
• Next day, Vernon makes Dudley get the mail
  • Vernon seems to be trying to be nice to Harry
  • Dudley bangs things with Smelting Stick all the way down the hall
  • Finds another letter for Mr. H. Potter, The Smallest Bedroom
  • Vernon leaps from seat to confiscate the letter before Harry can get to it
    • Vernon sends Harry to his bedroom, and tells Dudley to "Just go."
  • Harry comes up with plan for the next attempt
• repaired alarm clock goes off at six o'clock next morning
  • Harry quickly turns it off and dresses silently
  • Heads downstairs to go meet the postman on the corner of Privet Drive
  • Vernon is sleeping at bottom of stairs, Harry steps on his face
  • Vernon shouts at Harry for half an hour
  • Mail arrives in Vernon's lap
    • Three letters for Harry
      • Vernon tears them into pieces
• Vernon takes day off work
  • nails up the mail slot
    • thinks if they can't deliver they'll give up
    • Petunia doesn't think it will work
    • uses a piece of fruitcake to knock in a nail
• On Friday, no less than twelve letters arrive
  • Couldn't be put through the mail slot, the postman pushed them under the door, through the sides of the door, and pushed through the small window in the downstairs bathroom
  • Vernon stays home again
    • Burns all the letters
    • Gets out a hammer and nails and boards up the cracks around the front and back doors, so no one could get go out.
    • Hums "Tiptoe Through the Tulips" as he works
    • jumps at small noises
• On Saturday, twenty four letters arrive inside eggs
  • Milkman hands to Petunia through living room window
  • Vernon calls post office and dairy.
  • Petunia shreds letters in food processor.
  • Dudley wonders who wants to talk to Harry so badly.
• Sunday, Vernon is cheerful, "No post on Sundays."
  • However, 1 and 30 or 40 letters pelt out of the fireplace
    • (maybe a reason that the Dursleys board up their fireplace, replacing it with an "eclectic" one.)
  • Harry fails to grab one
  • Vernon pulls out tufts of his mustache
• Vernon decides they need to leave the house
  • tells everyone five minutes, pack only clothes
    • Ten minutes later they wrenched their way out of the boarded up door
    • Dudley tried to pack his tv, vcr, and computer in his sports bag
• They drove. And they drove.
  • Vernon would backtrack in hopes of throwing "them" off.
    • "Shake 'em off... shake 'em off"
  • No stops for food or drink
  • Dudley howling by nightfall
    • never had such a bad day
      • Hungry
      • missed five tv programs
      • Never went so long without blowing up an alien on his computer
• Railview Hotel, Cokeworth
  • Gloomy looking hotel on the outskirts of a big city. The Dursley's stop here while fleeing the Letters. Dudley and Harry share a room with twin beds and damp, musty sheets. They stay in room 17, not on the ground floor.
  • They eat stale cornflakes and cold tinned tomatoes on toast for breakfast the next day.
  • About a hundred Letters arrive at the Hotel for Harry.
    • Vernon slaps Harry's hand out of the way and goes to take the letters, presumably throws them in a trash.
• Petunia suggests they go home, hours later
• Vernon driving around:
  • middle of a forest
  • middle of plowed field
  • halfway across a suspension bridge
  • top of multi-level parking garage
• Eventually arrive at the coast
  • raining
  • Dudley says it's a Monday
  • The Great Humberto is supposed to be on TV
    • Reminds Harry that the next day, Tuesday, would be Harry's eleventh birthday
      • last year, Harry was given a coat hanger of a pair of Vernon's old socks
  • Vernon leaves them in the car
    • comes back with long thin package
    • Toothless old man has leant them a boat
  • Vernon rows out to a rock at sea with an old hut (lighthouse? unknown)
    • The Hut on the Rock on the Sea